I’m Brigid. My name is in the URL, so I have no expectation for anonymity. There are a few things I’ve been keeping bottled up. I’m afraid to share them, but I thrive on accountability.
The story I want to tell starts in February 2015, just about four years ago. I had just gone through a break-up, but this isn’t a break up story. That one, for all intents and purposes, ends where this one begins because it meant I moved into a beautiful apartment alone, far outside my means. I began to take on credit card debt in the 18 months or so I lived there, and I went off to graduate school carrying a balance of a few thousand dollars. In graduate school, I picked up a couple part time jobs, had buffer to live on, and had my tuition paid for, but I still managed to far out-spend my means on what feels like literally nothing in the fifteen months I was working on my master’s degree.
And I left to become a teacher saddled with debt that, frankly, I found embarrassing. So I mostly ignored it for two years after becoming a teacher. Turns out, ignoring debt while trying to throw money at it without also dramatically changing the lifestyle that led to that debt in the first place is not an effective strategy.
Even as I worked to become less materialist, consume less, and talked about how broke I am to an annoying extent, the debt haunts me like a specter.
Throughout this period, I also gained a bunch of weight, almost all of it after starting graduate school. Stress-eating, convenience foods, and excuses have ended me in a spot of feeling lethargic and moody, regardless of sleep and exercise levels, my usual ways of dealing with lethargy and moodiness. What culprit remains? My eating habits and weight. So, I need to deal with that part, too.
Which has led me here: writing about these two things that I most want to hide away in the dark recesses of my life until they just somehow resolve themselves without me having to figure out solutions the hard way. You know, the way where I have to acknowledge my own shortcomings and deal with the situation I have gotten myself into.
So, I am going to acknowledge them big-time. Publicly. Here. And then you can come along while I try to figure out how to resolve them.
Issues four years in the making? Let’s unravel them and get them fixed in half the time.
Over the next few days, I will share deep-dives on my initial statistics and outline my plans to begin to address related concerns.
Been there? Drop me a line. I’d love to know how you figured it out.